I was at the Nutjob Hills Diner having coffee this morning when I heard what has to be one of the ugliest rumors I’ve run into in a long time.

Apparently, given his recent success in tricking people into buying musical instruments at a discount if they’ll perform in his “concerts”, yoga guy is now attempting to put together a major event.

After making some undisclosed (but eminently guessable) arrangements with his suppliers he’s told his sales crew to give out coupons good for free ibanez guitars at musicians friend.  These coupons are allegedly good only to people who purchase at least one other instrument and agree to perform not only in the daily four A.M. “concerts” in his front yard, but also agree to perform in what he is calling the “citywide concert”.

apparently he’s going to position his “musicians” (total never-played-a-note-amateurs) at strategic points all over the city and have them commence playing no less than 39 different tunes simultaneously.  This event would, if he can convince the city council to allow it, take place at four A.M. and be broadcast using the largest speakers and amplifiers he can get hold of.  Said speakers to be mounted on telephone poles throughout the entire city limits.

If this happens, nobody in Nutjob Hills will sleep until it’s over.

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